Overcoming 3 Common Divorce Fears

When people talk about divorce, many emotions are often mentioned, including anger and sadness. But there’s one common emotion associated with divorce that isn’t talked about nearly enough, and that is fear. If you have just begun your divorce or are considering one and you are experiencing one or all of the common fears below, you are not alone. Fortunately, you can move past them and into your post-divorce life where fear will have less of a hold.

Fear of Being by Yourself

One major fear in divorce is simply the fear of being alone. This is especially common in gray divorces, or divorces involving older spouses who have been together for many years. This particular fear can hold people back and keep them trapped in a marriage that is no longer working and in which people have not been happy for a long time.

If you are worried about being alone, you can try to focus on the positive instead – divorce is an opportunity for a new beginning. When you invite some new people into your life, you will feel less alone and less affected by the fear of loneliness. Divorce is often an opportunity for people to re-form the connections that may have gone stale in the past as you struggled with your happiness in your marriage. Keep yourself open to new friends and new people.

Fear of No Future Happiness

Many people feel as if they may not be able to be happy again as they go through their divorce. Since the process of ending a relationship is often an emotional roller coaster and the future may feel unclear as you move on from a relationship that has formed the basis of your life until that point, this feeling is very natural. When you are feeling as if you are stuck in a space of regret and anger, it can be difficult to envision your life as happy again. While letting go is hard, it is necessary for you to move on. Divorce can be the starting point to finding happiness again. Instead of worrying about the past, begin to live for today and start to set yourself some short-term goals. When you are able to get some small things done, you will start feeling as if things are moving forward, and this can greatly improve your mindset and help you realize you have more control of your life and happiness than you may think. 

Fear of Financial Ruin

A fear of being unable to survive financially after a divorce is very common and very real. If, for example, your spouse made more money than you did, you may have a tough time figuring out how you will support yourself post-divorce. Many people have an incorrect idea of how divorces work and fear they will be left with nothing or will be impoverished while the other side keeps everything. Make sure you work with a divorce law in Albuquerque attorney. While you may worry about the expense of an attorney, not having one is usually not a good idea in most divorces and can lead to costly mistakes. Your attorney will help ensure your rights are preserved and you can get everything you are entitled to when it comes to your property division.

In addition, you can start preparing before your divorce is even started. Work with a financial planner to review your financial situation and get a good budget made. The earlier you start cutting unnecessary expenses and planning for being on your own financially, the better you will feel and the better decisions you can make through the divorce process. Make sure you discuss such plans with your attorney so they can help you realize your goals.

A divorce can raise a lot of fears, but it is normal and does not need to overwhelm you. Take the steps you need to move forward and take care of yourself along the way. Eventually, you will find yourself feeling better, enjoying some happiness in your life and having a solid financial foundation for the next phase of your life.