How to Make Your Divorce More Amicable

When a couple decides to get divorced, the transition can be harder if they let their emotions call the shots. Simply put, a couple who ends up in a very contested dispute during their divorce often spends a lot more money and experiences more stress than a couple in an amicable one.

If you want to have a divorce that is as amicable as possible, there are a few options to consider. Learn more about what you can do to make this happen with the help of your family law attorney, who will also fully explain the upsides and downsides of the different approaches to your particular case.

Consider Trying Mediation

To potentially avoid the hassle and cost of having to go to court so a judge can decide the issues in your divorce, consider using a mediator instead. This is a third-party professional who is entirely neutral and will work with you and your spouse toward agreements on hot-button issues. Keep in mind that a mediator will never represent a spouse and must remain neutral so the mediation sessions are fair. The role of the mediator is to help you and your spouse reach an agreement you both can accept.

Of course, since the mediator does not represent either spouse and can’t offer you legal advice, it’s common for spouses in mediation to each have their own attorney. In this situation, both spouses have a private meeting space with their attorneys. This gives them the benefit of having confidentiality, discussions with their attorney, and other professionals they may have consulted. The mediator will act as a facilitator of the negotiations, and they will go back and forth between the rooms or private areas as everyone works toward resolving the issues of the divorce and hammering out a final agreement.

There are a lot of benefits that can arise from using mediation in your divorce, including the common ones listed below.

•       Legal costs are usually lower if you settle your divorce outside of court.
•       Mediation is confidential, which is not always true of court proceedings.
•       You will have more control over what happens since you will decide the issues instead of a judge.
•       You can withdraw from mediation at any time if it is not working.
•       Agreements are normally reached more quickly in mediation than court.
•       Since mediation focuses on communication, it can help ease some tension between you and your spouse.

Decide Which Battles Are Worth Fighting

No one wants to have a divorce that drags out for months or years because they keep fighting with their spouse. Instead, many people want to settle the divorce as fast as they can and move on with their lives. To do this, you’ll have to pick your battles wisely. This will mean staying focused on the big picture and avoiding those small arguments that could derail your divorce case.

To help decide which battles are worth taking on, ask yourself questions about the issues at hand. What, overall, are the most important things to you? What must you get out of your divorce? What parts of your divorce are truly not nonnegotiable? Once you have answers to these questions, you’ll have a better idea of when to dig your heels in and when you should compromise or let something go. Keep in mind that your decisions here will have both an immediate and long-term impact on your life, so they need to be guided by logic and reasoning and not emotions. This can be a tough thing to do in a divorce, but the outcome is well worth your efforts.