Emotions run high during a divorce, and it’s all too easy to act without thinking things through. Unfortunately, social media now can document every single mistake you make in the form of posts, and these can be used against you in court in New Mexico. When it comes to using social media during your divorce, here are seven common mistakes you need to avoid to keep emotions as cool as possible and your case solid.
Getting ahead of yourself
When you’re used to posting regularly on your social media networks, it can seem odd to just keep quiet about a big event like a divorce. However, your discretion could help you avoid legal trouble and angry feelings, so it’s worth trying to talk to your ex about your social media plans. It will be better if you and your ex can decide together about what to post and when in regards to your divorce.
Talking negatively about your ex
Social media can be a great way to access a support system, but that doesn’t mean you should encourage your online friends and family to go after your ex. Nasty posts will only inflame tensions between you and your ex-spouse and your friends and family members. Forcing people to take sides does not usually turn out well for anyone, and it is especially important to avoid doing this if you have children together. There’s always a chance your child will find out about these posts, and that will create more stress and anxiety for him or her.
Sharing too much
You never know who will be reading your Facebook posts one day, and the last thing you want on there is way-too-personal information about your divorce. If you have something super personal you want to share with a friend or relative, the conversation should take place offline.
Harming your own case
Posts can be used against you when it comes to your divorce, including custody agreements and property settlements. While many people know not to post photos with drugs or alcohol use in them, they often fail to consider that things like expensive vacations or big purchases could come back to haunt them later, too. Judges may see the posts you put up stating derogatory things about your soon-to-be or ex-spouse and those statements can be used against you.
Spying on your ex-spouse
Many people have fallen into the social media snooping hole at one time or another, but it’s really not a healthy thing to do during a divorce. For starters, it can inflame tense issues between the two of you, which could prolong the divorce. It’s also not conducive to moving forward in your life. When you divorce, a new space opens up in your life that you fill with other things, but spending time focused on your former spouse can slow down this process and create obstacles between you and your new future.
Completely blocking your ex
Blocking your spouse from all of your social media may seem like the natural move, but you’ll need to consider the impact this will have on your real-life relationship first. If there have been issues with jealousy or tension in your divorce, blocking could be the right call. On the other hand, if the divorce is friendly or you are really committed to making co-parenting work, keeping your ex-spouse in the loop may help. Hiding his posts may be the way to go if you feel you need a break, and if you do eventually feel the need to block, let him or her know why first.
Going for the humblebrag
“Humblebragging” means you’re making what looks like a modest or innocent statement but you are really showing off instead. It’s something that is often seen on social media, and it can cause unnecessary problems during the divorce. Passive-aggressive posting, like date check-ins or photos with someone you are now dating, could slow down your own healing and create more issues with your ex. Ultimately, it’s also a way of staying in the past when you really need to start moving forward with your life.
Divorce and social media don’t often mix well together, so think before you post! If you are not sure about something, it’s always best to err on the side of caution.